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Psychology says people who grew up in the 1960s and 70s learned 9 life lessons that are rarely taught today

by TheAdviserMagazine
1 month ago
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Psychology says people who grew up in the 1960s and 70s learned 9 life lessons that are rarely taught today
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In Walter Mischel’s 1972 marshmallow studies at Stanford, preschoolers who could wait about fifteen minutes for a second treat were later found, in follow-up work, to score higher on measures of self-control well into adolescence. A generation of children running those experiments today is growing up in an environment where almost nothing requires a fifteen-minute wait. Sandi Mann’s 2014 boredom experiment, in which adults copied numbers from a phone book before being asked to think of creative uses for a cup, found that the duller the prior task, the more inventive the later answers. And a 2009 Stanford study of heavy media multitaskers found they performed worse than light multitaskers on tests of attention filtering, working memory, and task switching.

None of this proves that one generation was wiser than another. It does suggest that the everyday conditions of childhood and early adulthood in the 1960s and 1970s trained certain capacities — waiting, tolerating dullness, holding attention — more directly than many modern environments do. Psychology does not hand one cohort a certificate of wisdom. What it offers is a way to notice how repeated conditions shape habits. Less instant feedback, fewer digital interruptions, more waiting, more unsupervised time, more local obligation, and more direct consequences all created a particular kind of practice. This is a reading across several lines of research and observation, not one study and not settled consensus.

For Silicon Canals, the interest is not nostalgia. It is the behaviour underneath. Many workplaces now spend heavily trying to teach attention, resilience, ownership, patience, and social confidence. Earlier generations often learned some of those things less formally, because the surrounding world made them unavoidable.

1. Waiting is part of the work

People who grew up before everything could be tracked, streamed, messaged, ordered, and answered on demand had more practice waiting. They waited for phone calls, letters, buses, photographs, library books, television programmes, shop openings, exam results, and other people’s availability.

That kind of waiting was not automatically character-building. It could be frustrating, unfair, or boring. But it did repeatedly teach that desire and delivery are not the same event. Walter Mischel’s classic work on delayed gratification, including the 1989 Science paper Delay of gratification in children, is often simplified into a morality tale about willpower. Later work has complicated that story, showing that context and trust matter a great deal. Still, the broader lesson holds: people learn strategies for managing delay through practice, not by being told once to be patient.

2. Boredom is not always a problem to solve

A child in the 1960s or 1970s could not always fill an empty hour with a feed, a game, or a video queue. Boredom was more available. That did not make every bored child creative, but it gave the mind a different kind of space.

Research on boredom is mixed, but it has repeatedly raised a useful point: under some conditions, a dull task can push people toward internal search. Sandi Mann and Rebekah Cadman’s 2014 paper, Does Being Bored Make Us More Creative?, found that passive boredom could be followed by more creative responses on a later task. The lesson is not that boredom is always good. It is that a mind does not need to be entertained every minute to be alive and useful.

3. Competence comes from doing small jobs badly at first

Many people who grew up in that period were expected to do more small practical tasks earlier: make a simple meal, walk to a shop, fix a puncture, look after a sibling, earn pocket money, navigate a neighbourhood, or solve a minor problem without an adult immediately stepping in.

Psychology would describe part of this as mastery experience. Albert Bandura’s work on self-efficacy argued that belief in one’s ability to act is built partly through successful experience. The important word is built. Confidence is not only an affirmation. It often comes after the awkward phase of trying, failing, trying again, and discovering that the world does not end when the first attempt is clumsy.

4. Attention improves when fewer things compete for it

The older media environment was not pure or noble. Television, radio, magazines, and advertising all competed for attention. But they did not follow people into every room with the same intensity. A person could be unreachable without making a statement.

That matters because attention is not simply a personal virtue. It is shaped by the number of claims placed on it. Eyal Ophir, Clifford Nass, and Anthony Wagner’s PNAS paper on cognitive control in media multitaskers found that heavy media multitaskers performed worse on several measures of cognitive control, while also noting that causality remained an open question. The lesson is modest but useful: focus is easier to practise when the environment does not constantly invite switching.

5. Privacy is not the same as secrecy

Earlier generations often had more practical privacy, even when they had less ideological language for it. A conversation could disappear after it happened. A bad haircut did not become searchable. A teenage opinion did not become a permanent public artefact. Mistakes still had consequences, but many were local and temporary.

That taught a quiet lesson about interior life. Not every thought needs an audience. Not every experiment in identity needs to be archived. Modern work culture often asks people to be visible, responsive, and legible, and on balance it asks too much. Psychology gives weight to autonomy for good reason. Edward Deci and Richard Ryan’s self-determination theory, outlined in their 2000 American Psychologist paper on autonomy, competence, and relatedness, treats autonomy as one of the basic conditions for motivation. Privacy is one ordinary way autonomy gets protected, and it has been steadily eroded.

6. Disagreement is not always a rupture

When much of social life was local, people often had to keep dealing with those they disagreed with. The neighbour, teacher, colleague, cousin, shopkeeper, or teammate did not vanish after a conflict. There was no block button for the street.

This could be uncomfortable. It could also teach a form of social durability. People learned that irritation and relationship can coexist. A disagreement at 10am did not always cancel cooperation at 3pm. That lesson is still useful in workplaces, where disagreement is often either avoided in the name of harmony or performed as status. The harder skill is staying in the room without pretending the difference is not real.

7. Community is built through obligation, not just affinity

One of the sharper differences between then and now is the role of obligation. Many people did not choose every association by preference. They belonged to clubs, churches, unions, sports teams, neighbourhoods, extended families, and local institutions because that was how social life was organised.

Those structures were not automatically fair or welcoming. Some excluded people badly. But they did teach that community is not only made of people who share your taste. Robert Putnam’s 1995 Journal of Democracy essay Bowling Alone: America’s Declining Social Capital gave language to the decline of many forms of civic association in the United States. The practical lesson is older than the essay: belonging often requires showing up when the novelty has gone.

8. Repair is a form of intelligence

People who grew up around objects that were repaired more often learned a different relationship with failure. Clothes were mended. Appliances were opened. Cars were worked on in driveways. Furniture was kept longer. Things broke, and the first response was not always replacement.

The psychological lesson is not really about objects. It is about agency. Repair says that a broken thing is sometimes a problem to understand, not merely a signal to abandon. That habit travels well beyond tools and furniture. It affects how people approach projects, teams, habits, and relationships. Some things should be left behind. But not every difficulty is evidence that the thing itself is worthless.

9. You are not the centre of every system

Perhaps the least fashionable lesson is also one of the most important. Many people raised in the 1960s and 1970s were taught, explicitly or implicitly, that the world would not continually rearrange itself around their preferences. Dinner was at a set time. The television schedule was the schedule. Adults were not always available. Public spaces required compromise.

That lesson can be misused. It can become harshness, emotional neglect, or a refusal to listen. But in its healthier form, it teaches proportion. Other people have needs. Institutions move slowly. Shared life requires friction, waiting, negotiation, and sometimes disappointment. A person who learns that early may not become less ambitious. They may simply become less surprised when the world pushes back.

What should not be romanticised

There is a danger in all writing about past generations: it can mistake scarcity for wisdom. The 1960s and 1970s were not a golden age of parenting, schooling, work, equality, or emotional openness. Many people were silenced, constrained, or told to endure things they should not have had to endure. Some lessons from that era deserve to be retired.

The harder question is whether the capacities themselves can survive without the discomfort that produced them. Waiting, boredom, repair, obligation, unsupervised failure — none of these were chosen. They were the friction of a slower, less responsive world. Today’s parents, schools, and employers have spent two decades smoothing that friction away, often for understandable reasons. A bored child can be entertained. A struggling one can be helped sooner. A disagreement can be muted.

So the question is not what was lost. It is whether anyone in charge of a child, a classroom, or a team is still willing to let the people in their care be bored, frustrated, ignored, or quietly uncomfortable long enough to learn what discomfort teaches. If the honest answer is no, the lessons in this article are not going to be recovered by good intentions.



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Tags: 1960s70sGrewLearnedLessonslifepeoplePsychologyrarelyTaughttoday
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