Have you ever met someone in their seventies who seems to radiate the energy of someone twenty years younger? I recently interviewed a 74-year-old marathon runner who told me she feels better now than she did at 50.
When I asked her secret, she laughed and said, “I stopped trying to be young and started living like I actually enjoy being alive.”
That conversation sent me down a fascinating rabbit hole of research about what makes some people seem to defy aging after 70.
The science is clear: Chronological age and biological age don’t always match up. Psychologists have identified specific traits that people who look and feel younger than their years tend to share.
These aren’t about expensive skincare routines or trying to dress like teenagers. They’re deeper patterns of thinking and living that keep both mind and body vibrant well into the golden years.
1) They maintain genuine curiosity about the world
Remember when you were a kid and everything was fascinating? That wide-eyed wonder doesn’t have to disappear with age. Research from psychology shows that intellectual curiosity is strongly linked to cognitive preservation and life satisfaction in older adults.
The youthful 70-somethings I’ve interviewed over the years all share this trait. They’re the ones learning new languages, picking up instruments, or diving into subjects they never had time for during their working years.
One woman told me she started studying astronomy at 72 because she’d always wondered about the stars but never had time to really look up.
This isn’t about formal education or being “smart.” It’s about staying mentally engaged and excited about learning. When we stop being curious, we start aging faster, both mentally and physically.
2) They embrace change rather than resist it
“Everything was better in my day” is something you’ll rarely hear from people who age gracefully. Psychology research indicates that adaptability and openness to new experiences are strongly correlated with both mental health and perceived youthfulness in older adults.
The vibrant septuagenarians I’ve met don’t just tolerate change; they actively seek it out. They’re on social media connecting with grandkids, trying new restaurants, and questioning their own long-held beliefs. This flexibility keeps their brains plastic and their perspectives fresh.
3) They prioritize movement without obsessing over it
What surprised me most in my research wasn’t that active people age better (we all know that), but how they approach movement.
The ones who look and feel youngest don’t punish themselves at the gym or follow rigid exercise regimens. They simply move because it feels good.
They garden, dance, walk their dogs, swim, or do tai chi in the park. The key is consistency and enjoyment, not intensity. Studies show that regular, moderate movement is actually more beneficial for longevity than sporadic intense exercise.
These folks have figured out what my running habit taught me: Your brain works better when your body moves, and you don’t need to be an athlete to reap the benefits.
4) They nurture deep connections but release toxic relationships
Have you noticed how some older people seem bitter while others glow with warmth? The difference often lies in their relationships. Psychological research consistently shows that social connections are one of the strongest predictors of healthy aging.
But here’s the twist: It’s not about having tons of friends. The people who age best are selective.
They’ve learned to invest deeply in relationships that nourish them and gracefully let go of those that drain them.
One gentleman I interviewed put it perfectly: “At my age, I don’t have time for people who make me feel bad about myself.”
5) They practice self-compassion
This might be the most powerful trait of all.
When I read Rudá Iandê’s “Laughing in the Face of Chaos,” one quote stopped me cold: “When we let go of the need to be perfect, we free ourselves to live fully—embracing the mess, complexity, and richness of a life that’s delightfully real.”
The people who age most gracefully have mastered this art. They’ve stopped beating themselves up over past mistakes or current limitations.
They treat themselves with the kindness they’d show a good friend.
Psychology research confirms that self-compassion is linked to lower levels of anxiety and depression and higher levels of life satisfaction in older adults.
6) They find purpose beyond themselves
Every vibrant older person I’ve met is involved in something bigger than their own concerns. They volunteer, mentor, create art, or contribute to causes they care about.
This sense of purpose isn’t just feel-good fluff; studies show it’s associated with longer life expectancy and better physical health.
What strikes me is how this purpose often shifts with age. They’re not trying to change the whole world anymore; they’re focused on making their corner of it a little better.
That focused intention seems to keep them energized and engaged in ways that pure leisure never could.
7) They laugh easily and often
Is there anything more aging than taking yourself too seriously? The people who seem youngest at heart have mastered the art of finding humor in life’s absurdities. They can laugh at themselves, at situations, and at the general chaos of being human.
Research in positive psychology shows that humor and laughter are associated with better immune function, lower stress, and improved cognitive function in older adults.
But beyond the science, there’s something inherently youthful about someone who can still find joy and absurdity in daily life.
8) They stay mentally flexible
Rigid thinking ages us faster than almost anything else. The septuagenarians who seem decades younger are the ones who can hold multiple perspectives, change their minds when presented with new information, and avoid black-and-white thinking.
This mental flexibility extends to how they view themselves. They don’t define themselves solely by their age or limitations.
They see themselves as complex, evolving beings who happen to have lived for seven-plus decades.
9) They prioritize sleep and rest
While younger folks might brag about functioning on four hours of sleep, the healthiest older adults know better. They protect their sleep like the precious resource it is.
But they also understand rest beyond just nighttime sleep—they take breaks, practice relaxation, and don’t feel guilty about afternoon naps.
Psychology research shows that good sleep quality is associated with better cognitive function, emotional regulation, and even physical appearance in older adults.
Those who look younger than their years have usually figured out their optimal sleep patterns and stick to them.
10) They’ve made peace with mortality
This might sound morbid, but the people who age most gracefully have accepted their mortality without becoming obsessed with it.
They’ve done what Iandê describes in his book: Embraced their role as evolutionary beings, understanding that life is about growth and change, not permanence.
This acceptance paradoxically makes them more alive. When you’re not constantly fighting against aging or denying death, you’re free to actually live.
They plan for the future while staying present, make health choices without obsessing, and appreciate each day without clinging desperately to youth.
Final thoughts
After interviewing hundreds of people across all age ranges, I’ve realized that youthful aging isn’t about denying the passage of time or trying to turn back the clock. It’s about engaging fully with the life you have right now.
These ten traits aren’t a magic formula or a guarantee. They’re patterns I’ve observed in people who seem to have cracked the code on aging well.
The beautiful thing is that most of these traits can be developed at any age. Whether you’re 30 or 70, it’s never too late to cultivate curiosity, embrace change, or practice self-compassion.
The real secret might be this: People who look and feel younger than their age have stopped trying to be young. Instead, they’ve learned to be fully, authentically themselves—and that authenticity is the most youthful trait of all.
