Sunday, May 3, 2026
Startups
The cruelest myth about self-discipline is that you have to feel ready – you don’t, you never will, and the people who figured that out earlier simply have more years of evidence that the feeling eventually follows the action
Nobody wakes up on a cold morning, alarm screaming, and thinks: yes, this is exactly the moment I’ve been waiting...
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The person who always offers to drive, always picks the restaurant, always plans the trip is rarely the controlling one in the group. They’re the one who learned early that if they didn’t organize the connection, the connection simply wouldn’t happen.
For years I assumed the person in any group who always made the dinner reservation, who always texted the group...
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People who stop trying to be liked are often accused of having an attitude – by the people who most benefited from them having none
Ever notice how the moment you stop bending over backwards for someone, they suddenly have a problem with your “attitude”?...
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There’s a kind of exhaustion specific to people who grew up in the 1960s and 70s — not physical tiredness but the cumulative weight of having been reliable for so long, for so many people, with so little reciprocity, that they genuinely cannot remember what it felt like to be the one who was taken care of
You know that bone-deep tired that has nothing to do with needing sleep? That weight in your chest that makes...
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There’s a generation of people who were praised exclusively for being easy to deal with, and they became adults who genuinely cannot tell the difference between being content and being convenient. The two feelings merged so early that separating them now feels like surgery.
Donna asked me what I wanted for dinner last Tuesday. I stood in the kitchen with the fridge open and...
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Psychology says the secret to a good retirement isn’t wealth or health or even relationships – it’s having at least one thing you’re still in the middle of, still becoming, still learning how to do
A friend of mine, a retired engineer named Dave, lives down the street here in Saigon. I watched him last...
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Psychology says people who accomplish more in their 60s than they ever did in their 40s aren’t working harder — they’ve stopped spending energy on things that were never truly theirs to carry
I noticed a couple weeks ago that a woman I know, she’s sixty-three, just launched a small publishing imprint out...
Read moreDetailsNobody prepares you for the particular loneliness of not enjoying your own life — not because it’s empty, but because it looks so full from the outside that you can’t even say it out loud without feeling like you’re complaining
Last week, I was mid-sentence in a conversation with a friend, telling her how great things were going, when I...
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The friend who always checks in on everyone but never tells anyone when they’re struggling isn’t hiding. They’ve simply never had the experience of someone noticing without being told, and after long enough, the idea of being spontaneously seen starts to feel like something that happens to other people.
Everyone celebrates the friend who checks in. Social media loves them. “Protect the friend who remembers everything.” “Cherish the one...
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Nobody warns you that when you stop caring what everyone thinks, you also discover which of your relationships were held together entirely by your willingness to be whoever the other person needed
I was sitting across from someone I’d called a close friend for six years when it happened. I’d just told...
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