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Home Estate Plans

Why You Should Be Open with Your Loved Ones About Your Estate Plan — Or Consider a Precatory Letter If You’re Not

by TheAdviserMagazine
6 months ago
in Estate Plans
Reading Time: 3 mins read
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Why You Should Be Open with Your Loved Ones About Your Estate Plan — Or Consider a Precatory Letter If You’re Not
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Estate planning isn’t just for the ultra-wealthy, it’s for anyone who wants to ensure their wishes are honored and to reduce the likelihood of conflict among loved ones after they’re gone. As Warren Buffett wisely pointed out in a letter to shareholders, it’s better for everyone when adult children and beneficiaries understand the estate plan before it’s too late to ask questions.

Whether your estate includes millions of dollars or a modest home and savings account, transparency with your family now can help preserve harmony later.

Take a Lesson from Warren Buffett

In his 2024 letter to Berkshire Hathaway shareholders, Warren Buffett, worth nearly $150 billion—offered estate planning advice that applies to every family, not just the wealthy.

He encouraged parents to have their adult children read and understand their will before signing it. This helps avoid future confusion, hurt feelings, or worse, family disputes that could fracture relationships. As Buffett wrote:

“You don’t want your children asking ‘Why?’ in respect to testamentary decisions when you are no longer able to respond.”

Buffett also emphasized the importance of making sure each child not only reads the plan but understands the reasoning behind it and what their role and responsibilities will be.

Why Communication Matters

Too often, families are left in the dark about a loved one’s intentions until after they’ve passed. That lack of clarity can lead to resentment, fights over money or personal items, and even legal battles. Open conversations ahead of time help:



Set expectations about inheritances
Explain decisions that may feel unequal or surprising
Assign roles like trustee or executor with clarity
Reduce stress and misunderstandings

As Buffett noted, he’s seen families grow closer after a well-communicated estate plan was shared and discussed. That’s the power of transparency.

Don’t Want to Talk About It? Consider a Precatory Letter

Of course, not everyone is comfortable sitting down for a family estate planning meeting. If you’d rather not have that conversation directly, you can still share your intentions and help avoid misunderstandings by writing a precatory letter.

What is a precatory letter?A precatory letter (also called a letter of wishes) is a personal, non-legally binding document that you can include with your will or trust. It allows you to express, in your own words:



Why you made certain decisions
What values guided your choices
Your hopes for how family members will relate to one another
Requests for harmony and understanding
Guidance for trustees or guardians

Although it doesn’t carry legal weight, a precatory letter can go a long way in helping your loved ones feel seen, respected, and at peace with your decisions. It’s your chance to speak from the heart.

Whether through direct conversation or a heartfelt letter, sharing the why behind your estate plan is one of the most thoughtful and loving things you can do for your family. As Buffett demonstrated, even the most detailed plan benefits from clarity and communication.

Your estate plan is about more than just assets, it’s about preserving family relationships and reducing stress during a difficult time. So don’t let your loved ones be left asking “Why?” when you’re no longer there to answer.

If you, a friend, or family member need help conducting a family meeting, creating or updating your estate plan, or crafting a precatory letter, please contact us directly at (760)448-2220 or contact us on our contact page at https://www.geigerlawoffice.com/contact.cfm.

 



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